Mind-blowing threats

I think I totally just blew Mac's mind. And if you've ever tried to blow a two year old's mind, you'll know that it's harder than it sounds.

It's pretty hard for me to scare/intimidate my kid. I think he's totally realised that I would do everything in my power to stop anything bad from happening to him so he knows that anytime I threaten him with something the odds of me actually doing it are slim to none. So threats go unheeded in this house.Here are examples of things he's been threatened with in the past. Keep in mind that at least 25% of these aren't serious.

1. If you don't stop crying/yelling/harrassing the dog/having a hissy fit, mommy will sell you.
2. If you don't leave Hemi alone, I'm going to let him eat you.
3. If you throw giraffe again, daddy's going to rip him in half and throw him out (hubby's favorite threat because we're pretty sure Mac loves giraffe more than us - he still calls our bluff though).
4. I'm calling Santa and telling him to skip our house this year. (To be honest, I've already told him Santa doesn't exist, so this one is pointless.)

So you get the idea. But today, I finally threatened him with something that seems to have put the fear in him. His new favorite thing is hitting the button to open the cd drive on my laptop... over. and. over.again. As I have already spilled juice on the keyboard, I'm scared that my computer will just give up the will to live if too much strain is placed on it and hubby already told me I can't buy an other one unless I go get a job. So as we were eating lunch, my dear son started doing this. Half joking around, I told him if he did it again, I would bite his hand. Nothing, no reaction. Then I said I would eat his arm. Still nothing. So I said I would eat his neck. And his nose. At this point we were both laughing and it was just getting silly. Then I said I was going to eat his hair.

Laughing ended. A worried look crossed his face. He reached up and covered his hair with his little hand. "Eat my hair, Mom?" he verified, looking worried.  That's right. Little Mr Prima Donna is worried about losing his hear.

Who'd have thunk it?!


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