Goodbye

Today was sucktastic. Today was the day I had to say goodbye to my best friend, loyal running buddy and protector. I always pictured Hemi's death sort of like Marley and Me - you know, he'd be old and we'd know it was time. I never thought I would be putting him to death prematurely.

We made sure his last ten days were awesome though. Long walks. Snuggles. Lots of people food that he loved. Rides in the car. He also seemed to know something was up because he was extremely cuddly with me which he wasn't usually (he wasn't a really cuddly dog). He kept coming up to me and sniffing my face, giving me kisses and just being around me.

I feel horrible right now.

We buried him at the cottage in a spot with a nice view of the lake. He loved the lake. We also buried him with his ball and frisbee (he was obsessive compulsive when it came to fetch - he could do it for days without stopping) his first leather leash from puppy school, his collar and the running shoes I wore while we ran together training for the half marathon.

I sobbed the whole way home from the cottage.

There are so many things about him that I'm scared to forget. So many things I want to remember. Like the way he would tip toe into our room in the morning and come to my side of the bed and nuzzle my face with his nose. Or the pathetic whimpering he would make when you had food and he wanted some: like he hadn't been fed for years.  The way we used to "Sing" (howl) together. Running together. He was the best running partner a girl could ask for. How he would let us know whenever someone came near the house. The way he was crazy protective of me while I was pregnant, and then around Mac. The way he would whine starting about five minutes after we pulled out of the driveway until we got to the cottage (his favourite place in the world) to the point of driving us crazy. The way he would look all guard doggy at me when I'd pull into the driveway until he recognized me then he would go all crazy and happy.

I miss him so much already. We got him the same weekend we moved into our house. This house doesn't feel like a home without him.

Rest in peace buddy. Mommy loves you.
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