I love Christmas. I always have. I'm THAT person. The "wants to decorate November 1st, loves Christmas carols, enjoys finding the perfect gift for people" person. Christmas shopping doesn't USUALLY stress me out, and I like the hustle and bustle, the lights, the wrapping paper and the smell of scotch tape (weird, I know, you don't have to tell me).

But for some reason this year is different. I'm not into it at all and I don't know why. Despite the loss of Hemi, we still have a lot to be grateful for. After trying for over a year and losing two babies, I'm finally pregnant and seem to be doing well, I got most of my shopping done early, my brother was able to come visit, and I have an amazing job with great bosses.  But something is just off.

I found myself grumpy while shopping for people, annoyed at the cost of certain gifts, irritated with the amount of travelling we have to do Christmas day and the amount of people to visit.  I was talking to Harry tonight about this. I'm aware that this pregnancy has made me ridiculously hormonal and really easily irritated but at the same time, this is something that has bothered me since we had Mac. In an effort to see everyone, we're basically robbing Mac of Christmas at home. Harry and I decided that next year (especially since we will also have a six month old) we are going to go down to Kapuskasing a week or two before Christmas and do all our visiting then so that Christmas day we can actually take it easy and enjoy each other's company.

No I'm going to go find some chocolate in an effort to induce an attitude adjustment in myself. :)


Popular Posts